I musn’t forget…

2 Weeks.

Till the first phase moves into atangard.

The building.

2 Years.

Almost to the day, that this project was initiated.

2 Hot.

Outside this week.

2 Many answered prayers.

For me to deny that God really is faithful. I remember one meeting probably over a year ago where we looked at the story of the Isrealites escaping Egypt. The Lord, delivering these people from a life of slavery, performing miracle upon miracle, and it would seem that the Isrealites would almost instantly forget the Lords provision, and start to worry and complain…worry and complain..doubt and worry…complain. Mom talked about building a monument to remind us of the miracles, so we would never forget.

2 different temperatures.

..Coming out of the fosits at atangard, but not together. plumbing needs repair, and its a messy situation with years of (fill in the blank) patch up jobs.

2 be afraid.

The unknown stares us in the face and paralizes us. I have these feelings sometimes…they are fearful ones. They visit a lot of us and can cause us to loose hope, or sanity…or sleep or all of the above. They are not from God. How do I know what is from God? And what is reason or practicality or caution? What THOUGHTS (fears) do I tolerate and entertain? As a human, I like something tangable. Why do i forget the bible so easily?

2 entertain 2 long.

I may start to believe the lies. If I believe that God desires me (us) to do greater things then He did on earth, thats going to take a lot of faith. (our battles not against flesh and blood (” “))

2 be authentic.

I don’t want to pretend. I also don’t want to stay in the same place for the rest of my life. stagnancy is sad and boring if you desire to grow up. ..and frustrating as hell.

2 arrive.

That would be nice.

2 build a monument.

A mental monument perhaps? A memory that is in my heart. Of God putting a dream in his childrens hearts and then, in His wisdom and timing, carrying it out to fruition. And using the different gift and abilities of a bunch of underqualified, unexperienced, some very uneduacted, frightened, willing, generous, driven, modivated people, who were hungry for change…to do you know what…or maybe you don’t, im not sure I know…(but He will not delay). I don’t believe that God would bring us to the point of birth and not deliver.

2 Partner with Christ.

To have Christ as a partner? Like a real relationship? We would do stuff together? Make dicisions together? I’de have to really trust Him. and know Him, Ide have to want to spend a lot of time getting to know Him.

2 have “Half baked” next to you when you wake up.

Our little ceramic owl friend was designed in a way that makes him look a little stoned, as his eyes are half shut. We filled him with coffee grinds and his little twin has a flourishing peppermint plant growing from him. They will be moving with us into the atangard.

2 be content but not complacient.

2 learn to spell.

2 learn to love God.

2 enjoy life.

2 be thankful.

Today I want to simply remember what kind of God I serve. Faithful one.Trustworthy. Fearless. All knowing. Compassionate. passionate. generous. Extravagent. powerful. Dependable. Merciful. Gentle.

1cor 2:9 (scattered all through out my journal over the years, I think i was trying to make myself believe that life one day would be exciting)

Tess